To pap or not to pap

Today I made an appointment to do a pap test next week, 2 weeks after start of M as recommended. After that I spoke to my sis who gave me a good scare. She does hers with her gynae at $150 ($180 for first timers). That was waaayyy too ex, wasn't it? She told me nightmare stories of women who spotted for days after the pap test. *scared* what to do, what to do?

Finally, Today

This is the day I decided to start my blog. No particular reason, except to track our progress in creating our new life, keep track of the resources etc. This will be just one of many little baby steps we'll have to take. Who knows what the future brings until it happens ya? Hope this works out well for us =)

Decorated our x'mas tree and created a tiny x'mas corner. I've stopped taking folic acid on a daily basis, now taking every alternate day instead.

The reality

(backdated) This day, my period came while i was at work. Just prior to its arrival, I was still surfing motherhood forums and looking forward to the famous 'what to expect when you're expecting' book. At the first sign of blood, i realised how i really felt about having a baby. I teared sitting alone and in the toilet stall. then smsed hubby and msg sis to let them know the news. sis because i had asked her some advise about pregnancy and she asked if i was. it really was a classic case of not knowing what you want until you lose it?

nonetheless, there was of course some relief. yes, back to caffeine and heels and so many other things i couldn't really do liberally while i didn't know. but now me and hubby know not so easy to pregnant liao, also sigh of relief. we decided not to prevent for now. see how things go. perhaps the close brush with a baby made us realise, that we really were ready to be parents afterall =) perhaps the pregnancy test kit i ordered will come in handy next month

Folic Acid

(backdated) I happened to be on leave and was out shopping for our X'mas tree. After buying a cute little one for our really space-limited 3-room flat, i passed by a pharmacy and recalled all the motherhood forums i had read since my suspicions about the baby arose. Hence I popped in to buy a pack of folic acid. Even if i weren't pregnant, i rationalised, it was good to take it before pregnancy to prevent and abnormalities. Besides, it was cheap, under 5 bucks a pack of 100. I also happened to walk pass Eu Yan Seng and I saw the bird's nest offer at $128, a hefty discount from their normal $170+ price tag. I would consider buying it if the pregnancy test results positive, i decided. That night I took my first folic acid pill. In retrospect, that day, 2 days late for my period, was when i first started to be convinced that maybe the inevitable had happened, and we should just accept it, for better or for worse.

The due date

(backdated) My period was due today though it was notoriously known for being erratic. I was surfing the net when i saw a pregnancy test kit on promotion. Should I buy one? Since it was at a really reasonable price, I decided to get it; but due to the promotion, it would only be delivered a week later. That was good, i rationalised to myself, if by then my period hadn't come, then i would need to test before seeing a gynae right? surely testing at a gynae would be costly? and should my period come by then, then i could keep the kit until the next time we decide to take a gamble.

Nonetheless, I was starting to suspect that maybe we really had to prepare for a new member into the family. There were no signs and symptoms of my period coming at all. Was what i suspected about to be a reality? If so, we really still couldn't decide whether we were happy or sad about it all. I mean there were so many other things we hadn't done yet. We wouldn't be able to travel further for at least a couple of years. We couldn't eat a spontaneous relaxed lazy breakfast in the heart of orchard on a whim. Were we really ready to be parents?

Turning point one

(backdated again) This day, my frend was admitted to Gleneagles as her period wouldn't stop flowing. It was heavy (clots and overflowing) again after the SEVENTH day and she sought out a gynae in GlenE as KK just pushed her around and asked her to wait for an appointment a month later before seeing a gynae. Fortunately she sought 2nd and third opinion, finally visiting Gleneagles, Dr. Lisa Chin. She was found by the gynae to have low needed a blood count and needed a transfusion. We all (girls) popped down for a visit and she was pretty much alright, albeit a tad pale.

But it really got me thinking that we really ought not to take our health for granted. It wasn't a guarantee that a young healthy couple could definitely conceive. My worries of a conception due to our antics during the weekend faded somewhat and this was a turning point for me; where i started being more open minded to the option of a child.

Backtrack to start

I guess it all starts on this date (backdated entry) when we first had unprotected sex. I later realised that this was near my ovulation period and we had a good panicked session while we waited for the next period to arrive.